Saturday, May 31, 2008

Stuck in the Mud

I have been following the same pattern for years. I have always worked at Za's. I have always lived in Das Krankenhaus with my friends. I have spent every week of my life waiting for Alex, every Friday with him, and every Saturday saying goodbye to him. I have always gone crazy on Thursday evenings. I have a vague distant memory of my time in college, but nothing before that exists. I have never lived at home with my family, though I have dreams of what it would have been like.

NOW, THE TRUTH:

I have worked at Za's for two months. I have lived in Das Krankenhaus for one month. I have spent two Fridays with Alex this summer, and therefore two Saturdays saying goodbye. I went crazy last Thursday.

I have been in college for two years and lived with my family for almost eighteen years. HOW CAN I FORGET SO EASILY?????

3 comments:

Candid Carrie said...

You were raised to be part of a "catch and release" program.

You were caught as a very tiny infant and your caregiver spent her entire life getting you ready for just this time, to be released and allowed to feel everything you are experiencing where you are today. Enjoy your time, the best is yet to come.

Later in life you will need counseling as the childhood memories come flooding back in the form of wicked night sweats.

Until that time, seize the moment and keep a journal. It is a more cost-effective way to use your insurance benefits and your psychiatrist will thank you.

Emma Claire Foley said...

Good Lord.
When people call it "das" I just want to cry.

careysue said...

This is so cool, Ali listen to the other Carrie she's right! Yeah, hate to admit it, but she is! And she's not your mom so you can listen to her! :)