At Second Sight

It was a two person shift tonight at Za's. Yep, just me and the old manager. (Old, of course, meaning 25.) Two person shifts are always really slow, so the old manager thought it'd be great to ask me Important Questions. ("What is the root of all evil?" "If you had three bullets and no consequences who would you kill?") The first question, however, was so clichéd, so obvious, that I felt a little unsettled answering.

"Do you believe in love at first sight?"

No.

"How about second sight?"

No. I don't even know what that is.

"C'mon. You look. And then you look again. Instant love!" (My old manager is a little hyper. He's the one that will sleep when he is dead.)

No. The thing is, I believe that you can Fall In Love with someone at first sight, or in the shower, or tying your shoes, or as you both reach for the same breadstick or whatever, but that is irrelevant. Eh, who doesn't Fall In Love every day? Everyone is interesting and exciting and in my head and in novels they would all give me a perfectly charmed life and would always think that I smelled good and said cute, silly things. What are more relevant are those relationships that turn unconditional.

I know, I know, you're only supposed to unconditionally love your parents and your children, or something like that, but sometimes, with a few special people, we slip up. Sometimes you go from exclaiming over your shared interests to following the same patterns of thought without noticing it. Sometimes you cross a boundary, where you know there is no return. You can't go any farther with the person mentally, because you haven't even gone that far in your own head. And when you argue, it isn't particularly troublesome that you are both disregarding the other's feelings, because you are tied together, the future holds you both in the same net.

I've lost touch with a lot of friends, but there are some people that I know I'll always feel resting their hands on my shoulders. I know I'm probably too young to say this, but I know that sometimes the boundaries don't matter, the rules are forgotten, and there are some people you'll know forever.

No, I don't believe in love at second sight, but I do believe that I have a few soul mates.